Thursday, February 11, 2010

Individuality and False Ego

What follows is a model of human existence. It is not the only possible model, even if it is correct. I can say that I have been unable to refute this model. It fits the observed evidence and explains it in a way that other models do not. It is little known or spoken of for reasons that will become clear.

Infinite awareness (IA) is our true being. There is only one of us here.
In order for IA to know itself, it creates worlds of manifestation and vehicles with which to experience those worlds. These worlds and vehicles have no independent reality apart from IA.
A useful metaphor for our reality is that of a holographic role playing game (RPG). IA is the creator and also the sole player of the game. While there may be lots of different games, the one "we" are now playing is called Evolution. Evolution is the process whereby IA extends the consciousness range of it's vehicles to allow for new possibilities for it's expression. It does this by creating challenges and then transcending them. Evolution is not about survival.

The RPG contains both player and non-player characters. The player characters are vehicles for IA (eg. humans, animals, plants, etc.). Non-player characters are not. They are programmed into the game to serve as challengers and adversaries to be transcended. Your individuality, point of view, or "fiction suit" is a player character. It is not the player, mind you; that would be IA. False ego is a non-player character. It is the "foreign installation", or "flyer" of Don Juan Matus, the "archon" of the Gnostics. A very good article by John Lash on this subject is available here.

Most philosophical systems and models of reality do not make this distinction between individuality and false ego. There is a good reason for this. The false ego is programmed to pretend to be you. That is it's primary strategy. It does not want you to know that it isn't, because as long as you think it is you, you will not transcend it. Don Juan's description of this energetic reality is well worth studying. It is in Casteneda's final book: The Active Side of Infinity, in the chapter called Mud Shadows. If you consider Don Juan a reliable source, then his assertion that this is the "topic of topics" is worth taking seriously. I won't say much more about false ego, since I've done that quite a bit in other posts.

What I haven't previously talked about is the nature and function of the "player character" or individuality. This is not the false ego. If the false ego were transcended, individuality would still remain. Individuality has real value for IA. It provides a vehicle for it's experience. Each of these vehicles is unique and offers it's own potentials to be realised. These potentials are defined by the spacetime patterns present at the moment of the vehicle's emergence into being. These are the patterns described by astrology and other systems of spacetime mapping. Realising the possibilities of the individuality is the same as Crowley's "true will". This is only fully possible once the influence of false ego has been removed. The individuality is not meant to be transcended. It is meant to be experienced in it's fullness. After all, IA didn't have to create worlds of manifestation. IA could have remained in a condition of undifferentiated unity. Therefore it seems evident that as much as we desire union with IT, the opposite is also true. IA wanted to be us, or we would not exist. To realise our true identity with IA, rather than false ego, is not to become the Borg. It is false ego's influence that demands conformity and interferes with our uniqueness.

As I stated in the beginning, this is a model, as are all our descriptions of what is. No model can be equated with the reality it represents. The map is not the territory. The finger pointing at the moon is not the moon. The value of a model lies in it's utility. A good model is one that allows us to conceive, however dimly, that which is beyond language and form. In my own case, this model has proven more useful than any I have previously worked with. In the few years I've been using it, I have noticed increased authenticity and a massive reduction in interpersonal drama.


  1. This is a VERY good post!

    The false ego construct is new to me but sounds interresting. Will search your blog for them (unless you perhaps point me to some of your references to the false ego... will speed up my search)

    The basic idea, as expressed so well here, is one I have expereinced long ago, and which sent me on my own journey of discovery :)

  2. Thanks Tertius. I've just installed a search bar near the top of the page. That should help. Just search "false ego" and you'll have them all. The Mud Shadows link in the post contains really useful descriptive and strategic info. Here are some other links that might interest you:
    Mind Parasites, Energy Parasites and Vampires
    The Controllers Agenda - Gnosticism, Archons/Greys
    There is also a novel by Colin Wilson called "Mind Parasites" that portrays their behavior pretty accurately, although some aspects of the story are a bit silly and over-the-top.
    The activities of the false ego are a lot like those of the control system. I'm sure they are the same energetic construct differently expressed. Also, like the control system, once I started to pay attention to what FE does, it seemed so obvious and odious that I wondered how I'd not noticed it before. If you study the control system, you'll know all about FE and vice versa.

  3. Whoops, I thought the search bar would look through tags, but it only finds words within the text (sigh). So you'll get better results if you search "ego" instead.

  4. Will use the search. Thanks for that!

  5. Interesting post. I have also experienced a near total elimination of drama by virtue of awareness of ego. I first discovered this level of presence thanks to reading "A New Earth" by Eckhart Tolle.

  6. This analogy of life as an RPG is something I've been thinking of myself. The false ego is indeed a cunning and most worthy adversary.

    "Realising the possibilities of the individuality is the same as Crowley's "true will". This is only fully possible once the influence of false ego has been removed. The individuality is not meant to be transcended. It is meant to be experienced in it's fullness."

    Yes! This is why I see the attainment of "Nirvana" in this life as just a sort of optional side mission, one that may enhance our experience, but that is certainly not why we're here. We came from that state (whatever it is exactly, I don't pretend to know), and we will revisit it again beyond the mortal plane anyway. The old wisdom of "living life to the fullest" holds its place. The false ego, of course, twists that around as is its wont, but the true self knows that the authentic life is the most fulfilling life.

  7. Hi Dave. Yes, Eckhart Tolle's description of, and suggestions for dealing with, the "pain body" was one of the early clues that resulted in this model.

    Hi BCth. I totally agree. Somehow the idea that the only reason were here is to escape doesn't make much sense to me. Although I must admit that escape is certainly appealing sometimes. I can see how the techniques of the escapist traditions can be of value since they lead to an experience of unconditioned perception. Only I don't see this as an ultimate end in itself.

  8. There is an excellent movie out that examines some of the main ideas of this post, and both of our blogs overall ... I don't want to spoil it for you though so just rent "The Nines" : ... and stick with it, it's not the movie it seems to be, at first.

    Great post, good food for thought ... chewin on it like a cud!

  9. Hi Teapotshappen. Thanks. I have seen The Nines. It's very strange and unusual and I love those sorts of films. I'll probably get a copy eventually. It's the sort of movie that ought to be seen more than twice.

  10. I've been thinking a lot about models and theories and such, from a meta level. Being embedded in the sciences I'm seeing first hand the interplay between theory (what we think to be true, or in our case can describe mathematically) and reality (our measurements, which are always different, sometimes because of 'noise' but often inexplicably.) At any given time it is obvious that our theories are inadequate and yet, great passion goes into their extension and defense for though science cannot prove any of their theories to be true (even they admit the impossibility of this), deep down they believe them to be so. Or - for buried psychological reasons unacknowledged by others and no doubt in many cases by self - they hope they are true, for there is something in their implications that appeals....

    In essence this is no different from religious faith in scripture (note I did not say God.) Or an ideologues attachment to their particular ism.

    Contrast this with Robert Anton Wilson's 'maybe logic' epistemology where the object is to look at as many theories as possible without believing any of them at all, using each as a lens through which to view the world and then seeing what it will show. Even lenses that are personally distasteful will reveal hitherto unseen features of the mindscape.

    Of course, some beliefs will always be more solid than others. Gravity, for instance, is something I certainly believe in. 9/11 is another (one in which gravity plays a big role ;) Even so it is good to test those beliefs out every once in a while: to subject them to doubt, and ask "Do I still believe in this?" Whether this amounts to sitting there trying to imagine gravity away (or forget it exists) and thus float or fly, or it means a soul-searching hour or two asking, "Am I wrong about 9/11? And JFK and the Federal Reserve and the Reptiles? Are all the conspiracies just a figment of my fevered imagination?"

    Well of course they are. I am the universe, I am the dream of myself, I am without and within for although at this moment I appear to be this body, these actions, these thoughts in truth ... I am made of matter as anything else, and as such are part of a vastly greater system: a fractally inscribed holographically distributed panpsychosm in which the smallest element is fully in-formed by the whole.

    Did you see that we now have hard, physical, experimental evidence to support the theory that the universe is a hologram of matter and light, projected from its fringes into the space within itself? The discovery - found in the 'noise' of a long and very sensitive laser interferometer that had been (unsuccessfully) searching for gravitational waves for a decade - will rank up there with the radio astronomers who first found the cosmic microwave background. Perhaps even greater, the more I think of it for the implications....

    Science would have to come to grips with the notion that the universe is a hologram. The realization by many that they might achieve the sort of Realization you spoke of above is not far behind this notion: once the holographic universe is processed, many will find the way open to the invisible path through the AI of the false ego and up to the IA of the Godself.

    But to do this, one way or another, we must all at some point learn the trick of putting theory aside that the All may be seen for what it is.

  11. Hi Psychegram. The myth of scientific detachment is usually just that, a myth. It's funny that scientists so often imagine themselves to be objective even though they rarely devote any effort toward introspection. As a result they are oblivious to their own hidden motives and blind spots. It should be obvious that no theory can be proved. That being the case, every effort should be made to disprove it by seeking out anomalies and adjusting the theory accordingly. Instead, the anomalies are routinely ignored or forced to fit. Earth-centered astronomy was a perfect example. This sort of thing must be so frustrating for someone like yourself.
    Having tried out and discarded several models over the years, I've learned not to get attached to them. Twenty years ago, I thought I knew plenty, but I didn't. Ten years ago, I knew more, but nowhere near what I do now. And I fully expect (and hope) to see my present understanding become obsolete as well. A world without mystery would be very boring IMO.
    "Reality is the only word in the English language that should always be used in quotes." — Anonymous

  12. It is frustrating. You have no idea.

    But then I remember what I was like 10 years ago ... five years ago ... the things I used to believe as "reality" and, well, puts some perspective on things.